Eating together with my family, around a beautifully set table with flowers and cloth napkins (more ecofriendly), politely passing well-balanced dishes of organic, creatively and exquisitely seasoned fare, as we share the poignant moments of our lives mixed with humorous anecdotes about the day, and ending the meal with a heartfelt, soul sharing moment, as I wash dishes with my husband - has never happened a day in my life. All those expectations have never been realized in the span of one meal. I've occasionally served some good food. Important conversations have happened and flowers have been placed in a vase. But ALL of my expectations of what a happy, healthy, loving, deeply evolved family looks like have never been met completely.
My reality this week (and many weeks) was more like non-organic, frozen pizza on a paper plate, sitting in front of a Netflix offering with each of us silently staring at the screen.
I could bemoan this confession and even cite it as proof that I have in fact failed the non-existent parent test. I choose instead to highlight the one super great fact of my special frozen pizza dinner - we were all together. My 13 and 15 year old sons were watching TV in the same room, with me. You have to look for your victories sometimes.
I still have great expectations. Thankfully the one major expectation I have been able to honor is looking for the good in my kids - focusing on their good qualities, their strengths. Now I just need to remember to do that for myself.
Frozen pizza - gift to all parents, especially at the end of a long week!
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